Magic-Store Employee Not The Same Since Losing Virginity

“With [the recent success of] Lord Of The Rings and Harry Potter, we’re looking at a total resurgence of the entire industry,” Welch continued. “Now is a great time [to pursue a career in] magic, but Scottie’s completely blowing it. I’m not worried, though. Sooner or later, he’ll come to his senses. He’ll realize that getting laid is temporary, but magic is forever.”